Zindagi Gulzar Hai!!! (Shaadi Ka Laddu- 2)

            On my way to work today I saw these colorfully dressed, adorned with all sorts of jewels, women; orange and red vermilion painted across the forehead. Well this is a routine sight on every Thursdays when you stay in Bihar/ Jharkhand and cross numerous temples on way to work; but today seemed propitiously special for these glowing faces. Many of them seemed to be newlyweds; I could tell with the bracing novelty on their faces and the keen patient eyes looking for instructions from the experienced ones. There are days like this when I really miss feeling like a married one. I could have been one of these; had it not been the inadvertent death in the family.

            I am not reckoned for being a very religious person (except for praying every day, which I do since I was 5 years old); as the counterfeiting logic is always there at my service always; still today was different. Perhaps the idea of doing something for someone makes it more consecrated. Well, there was this thrill of inaugural revering and imbibing the new skill; anyways there always is next time.  

            I may not be sounding like myself in this post to a lot of people who know me very well; but I guess it’s true when people say things take a turn and people change, post marriage.

            The common observation is that Shaadi been discussed more as a commodity than as a concept, an institution these days. As the regular shopping malls or even websites which deliver, the “best suited match” anywhere, anytime and anyway you like. I listen to people with different attributes with varied thoughts on this issue. And the most amazingly thought-provoking question that brings my mind to stand still is that; when people are most attract towards the people with most opposite qualities, why when it comes to getting married, a person starts counting similarities as winning points.

            There are things and reasons to enjoy the uncertainty the other person brings in the relationship and then there are other things; which perhaps are meant to be ignored or dealt in this specific way, which I am yet to learn. The mundane routine could be stirred occasionally by some insubstantial contention; but there will be times when undue amorousness would take over and pacify the rest.

            May be marriage is more about living in the immediate moment, a choice to love despite the other person’s shortcomings. Perhaps marriage is about learning that love is not about life being perfect all the time, but is instead a tool to grow in our lives. Satiating each others limitations, making every moment count, being better halves to each other and completing selves; I guess that is what actually sums up to perfect marriage.

           

"People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that's what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life.

A soul mates purpose is to shake you up, tear apart your ego a little bit, show you your obstacles and addictions, break your heart open so new light can get in, make you so desperate and out of control that you have to transform your life, then introduce you to your spiritual master..."

            ~Eat Pray Love